Are the Borg a Collective of Narcissists?

”We are the Borg. Lower your shields and surrender your ships. We will add your biological and technological distinctiveness to our own. Your culture will adapt to service us. Resistance is futile.” – standard Borg hail

The Borg.

There are two things I love (well, at the moment) – classic “nostalgia” Star Trek (1966-2005) and reading up on psychology. Having endured a long-term relationship with a narcissist (and perhaps growing up with parents with narcissistic traits), I’ve been engrossed in reading up on Narcissistic Personality Disorder. I’ve been using resources online and the brilliant Malignant Self Love: Narcissism Revisited by Israeli-Macedonian author, psychologist, and polymath Sam Vankin, Ph.D.

Narcissists are slippery characters: they can charm, act in a “lovely” manner, and to many, appear as perfectly sweet and helpful people. In a relationship, an initial loving “idealisation” can give way to “devaluation”, Narcissists subjecting their partners to outright cruelty through name-calling, gaslighting, and in extreme cases, physical violence.

Though the Borg are a collective cybernetic consciousness, they are considered one entity or “Hive.” There are no individuals in the Borg Collective, only drones servicing their primary functions. They assimilate other species with the use of special technology. During this assimilation process, individuality and free-will is purged and the species are transformed into Borg drones.

The Narcissist, according to Vaknin, is tasked with promoting a projected image of oneself which they maintain at all times. This “program” is similar to how the Borg operate. So, what are the rules of the Borg, as portrayed in the various incarnations of Star Trek?

The Rules of the Borg

The classic “screen rules” of the Borg as portrayed in Star Trek: The Next Generation and a certain extent in Star Trek: Voyager are:

• The primary function of the Borg is to assimilate other species to advance their race towards technological and biological perfection.
• These cultures and species are adapted to serve the Borg, never the other way around.
• The Borg, in this pursuit, are self-perceived as superior to other species as they approach this goal through assimilation.
• The Borg ignore species or intruders on their territory if they do not pose a direct threat.
• The Borg attempt to destroy species or technology they cannot control or understand.
• The Borg will abandon drones or technology that no longer serves any function to their primary goal.
• Borg drones that display attributes of individuality or free-will are disconnected from the Collective and left to die.

The Commonality between Borg and Narcissistic Personality Disorder

According to Vaknin, describing the traits of a Narcissist in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders by the American Psychiatric Association (regarded as the psychologist’s “handbook” for mental health disorders), a Narcissist:

• Has an inflated valuation of oneself (sees themselves as superior to others)
• Gives off an impression they cannot be disturbed, acting nonchalant or unimpressed
• Does not value the rights of others, and will infringe on these rights as they see fit
• Subsumes or imitates their role models, insofar the Narcissist "becomes" their object of desire
• “Destroys” objects of frustration or grief through intense rivalry, gossip, or extreme measures even to the detriment of oneself
• Experiences cognitive dissonance – they devalue what they envy, “grapes are sour and craved at the same time”

It would seem, at least superficially, that The Borg and Narcissists assume many of the same qualities. Both see themselves as “superior”; ignore what is not valuable or threatening; take without asking; assimilate others; and aim to neutralise existential “threats” whether perceived or real.

The Borg don’t hide the fact they want to assimilate your species: they will show up unannounced and declare your life is over and you now service them. Narcissists may charm those in their orbit through a “love bombing” stage. This is where they shower platonic or romantic partners with gifts, praise, and attention in exchange for their loyalty and attention, known as Narcissistic Supply. Once the fountainhead of Supply is restricted or exhausted, they may devalue the partner and move on to another “mark.”

The Borg are described in-canon as a plague that assimilates cultures and species at whim. When their task is complete, they simply “move on.” They have no concept of human “value” insofar their programming – achieve perfection through assimilation – allows it.

The main point of difference is that Narcissists bury their True Self in a False Self. Narcissists are often compulsive liars, especially when it inflates their self-perception as special, to perpetuate their False Self image. The Borg will tell you they’re going to assimilate you and if you resist, they’ll destroy you. You can’t get truth any more naked than that.

Punctured Armour

Over this year, I’ve read three books that have changed my life. All three combined shifted my thinking and feeling on an existential level, on par with No More Mr. Nice Guy and the work I’ve done with the Melbourne Chapter over six odd years. They are:

• Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead by Brene Brown
• What Men Still Don't Know About Women, Relationships, and Love by Dr. Herb Goldberg
• Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find - and Keep – Love by Dr. Amir Levine & Rachel Heller

Prior to reading any of these books, writing this post would be unthinkable to me. Since, it’s been a trying exercise to open up and understand the nature of how I act and interact with others. Revealing oneself isn’t weakness, it’s Wholeheartedness. Focusing on what women tell me and not what they need is following Content, not Process. Keeping significant others at arm’s length isn’t a deep need for independence, more an attachment style known as Fearful Avoidance. To the outside world, these are meaningless buzzwords. To my friends and family, I imagine it just boils me down to a quiet, unknowable asshole.

Same goes for those featured on puerile reality shows such as Married at First Sight or Seven-Year Switch. I’m sure there are countless others that exploit neuroses as entertainment. Clashing attachment types creak under the weight of their own internal burdens until collapse. Opening up about themselves causes sweating, a clenching of fists, the desire to run away.  I imagine half the population wonders why speaking about such simple inner truths seems like torture to these people. For someone like me, who grew up reading, building with Legos and playing computer games on his own for most of his childhood, it seems perfect and rational.

I often think that changing oneself is a Heisenberg principle – you know where you’re going or you know where you are, never both at the same time. I’m making new friends and new connections, and it scares me to think in the new ways. Maybe they give a shit? Maybe closeness won’t send the sky hurdling toward my head? Maybe everything I learned is a god damned lie? I hope it will all be for the better.

Of course, I use music to put it all in perspective. Two songs in particular sums up my experience living “as me.”

A Holey Meditation

"If some one can prove me wrong and show me my mistake in either thought or action, I shall gladly change. I seek the truth, which never harmed anyone: the harm is to persist in one's self-deception or ignorance."

-- Marcus Aurelius, Meditations (Book 6.21)

I had a thought that came to me in a dream the other day that concerned the perception of others and how one lives a life. Imagine you put everything you did in life - work, friends, family, hobbies, etc. etc. into a space 100m by 50m square and erected a 10" fence around it. In the middle of that fence is a hole, approximately 1 or 2cm in diameter. About 90% of the people who meet you will see your life through that restricted peephole, the information they glean from it effects their feelings and judgment toward you; the measure of your character according to them is essentially only a very rough and incomplete estimation.

So if what they see is incomplete, how can one take umbrage to their opinions of you? They do not speak of you personally since they only take in less than 1% of who you are, all of which is tainted by their biases and preconceptions - the clothes you wear, the music you listen to. We may all have shared experiences but they are all unique to us and us alone. So how can we possibly take the infantile ad hominem attacks personally when they cannot describe us all? Our names are convenient identifiers but they can easily be changed. As social animals we rely on others to explore our own humanity - compassion, friendship, anger and love. Some of us strive for truth - insofar that we do not falsify intentionally - but we must also remember that there are only degrees of certainty; probabilities and details we inevitably leave out. We have the capacity to reason with logic and the scientific method and properly explore the world around us and constantly ask questions.

 

That said, we must also be cognizant of our limitations - our weaknesses, our faults and our shortcomings - as they also make us who we are. Human.

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